A Big Mac attack is hard to avoid, even for some vegans. And if you watch the Super Bowl, forget it. With commercials like the one above, you are doomed. America's love for thin, gray hamburger (?) patties that sit under heat lamps with orange salad dressing…
Soleil Moon Frye has a million-plus people hanging on her every 140 characters, thanks to awesome tweets such as this: "A little sentence to finish. I am really good at..." Crowd participation is huge. Now, some of you may be asking, "Who the…
M.I.A. thought she would be on before the headlining Beastie Boys when she agreed to do the Outside Lands Festival, but things changed when Adam Yauch, a.k.a. MCA, was diagnosed with cancer. M.I.A. was none too happy to be opening up for the Beasties' replacement…
Today marks the end of the 26-year-run of "Reading Rainbow," hosted by LeVar Burton. The PBS show is a casualty of recession cutbacks, and a change in focus at the Department of Education. "'Reading Rainbow' taught kids why to read," said…
It's not as easy to play the air guitar as you think. You can't discount the theatrics and big hair. (I miss you, Vixen!) Something about these performances makes me want to slide into a pair of stone-washed jeans and spray a couple of cans of Aqua Net in…
New York Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter is engaged to "Friday Night Lights" star Minka Kelly, if you believe Mr/s. Anonymous Source, quoted on Page Six in the New York Post. Jeter has dated every attractive woman in New York -- and maybe a few…
Geeks think of some pretty cool stuff, and the All Edges Brownie Pan is certainly up there with light bulbs, airplanes, and air conditioning. The big pitch for the serpentine pan is: "This is the end of dry edges and uncooked centers." It even promises…
According to Us Weekly, Jennifer Aniston is upset that Bradley Cooper, her co-star in "He's Just Not That Into You," is just not that into her. Cooper dared to have dinner with Aniston at least once, but is now getting cozy with Renee Zellweger. Aniston…
The only thing better than loving "Mad Men" is pretending to understand it. Not getting the show but passing yourself off as a fan is something every guy who works for Sterling Cooper would do, so consider yourself ahead of the game. According to…
Way to start the season, "Mad Men." And I don't mean all the drama: I mean that close-up of Jon Hamm's gnarly finger toe. Or maybe it was a toe stunt double, since he was boiling milk, and you can never be too careful boiling milk around a star's…
Ice-T just did something I cannot believe is legal. PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Apples) doesn't care about this cruelty? If you can stomach it, Ice-T rips apart a Macbook in the video after the jump (peppered with language that is NSFW). I…
Can you still be a cougar past age 50? This is the question we have to ask when confronted by 51-year-old Sharon Stone, nude on the cover of Paris Match (SFW), with the headline: "J'ai 50 ans, et alors!" That means "Somebody acknowledge my…
Are you ready to dance your cares away? Work is for another day -- except the work being done on the "Fraggle Rock" movie. Brian Henson, Jim's son, must have a team of Doozers hammering them out: they're working on the "Dark Crystal" sequel,…
It is hard not to think of Charles Nelson Reilly as the scarf-wearing funny man on "Match Game," but CNR was much, much more than that. He directed opera. He won a Tony award. He taught acting. He even Twitters from the grave: "Thinking about…
Joe Jackson doesn't need a DNA test to make a determination of paternity. When he saw Omer Bhatti, he says, he could tell that Batti is Michael's son. "He looks like a Jackson, he acts like a Jackson, he can dance like a Jackson," he said in…
Comedian George Lopez thinks President Obama owes him a big favor for landing him the Hispanic vote. Who knew that "those 38 votes would be the difference," Lopez tells Zap2it.com. Obama appeared in a promo for Lopez's forthcoming new show, "Lopez…
Is Mr. T out of gold chains to hock? Who would do such a dastardly thing as put "The A-Team" van (or a lookalike of the van that B.A. Baracus used to drive through explosions) for sale on Craigslist? Only $999. But Mr. T isn't the only suspect. The…
First, Seth Rogen embarked on an aggressive workout routine. Now he's cruisin' in a '66 Chrysler Imperial for the upcoming "Green Hornet" movie. Can we handle Seth Rogen as a badass stud? Seth Rogen, the guy with the girlfriend voice in the clip…
Fresh today: a man fights a car. Who wins? Define "win." On the other hand, the fools in the video after the jump could learn something about head butts from this guy.
David Eggers has had a couple good ideas: McSweeney's; "A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius," "Where the Wild Things Are." Maybe more. But this is not one of them: proposing that full-color comics can save newspapers and journalism. You're…
President Obama threw out the first pitch of the All-Star game, wearing a Chicago White Sox jacket, and the American League went on to win its thirteenth straight All-Star Game against the National League. But then, we could have predicted this outcome. Every…
Showtime's "Live Nude Comedy" is a mix of stand-up and modern burlesque, so you can laugh and, um, enjoy other things, then laugh some more. Shannon Elizabeth, of "American Pie" fame (watch her play poker against George Costanza above), will…
There's no better way to celebrate Independence Day than by declaring yourself independent. And you don't even have to fake your death like Earl does above in the clip above. Break those chains, free yourself from your significant other's iron grip and…
Christian Bale played Batman? All I remember from "The Dark Knight" was the rad Batmobile and Heath Ledger's limp. Was there more than that? Whatever. Bale says his days manning the Batphone are probably over, especially if director Chris Nolan bails.…
Turns out college students are spending more time updating their Facebook status ("I just scratched my knee") than they are hitting the books. An Ohio State University study found that college Facebook user's GPAs were a point lower on average than…
Just because a guy swings from a rope onto your ship through a cloud of cannon smoke, does not make him a pirate. Just because a dude says, "Shiver me timbers!" a lot does not make him a pirate. Knowing the combination to Davey Jones' locker, also…
When Shane Battier left the Duke Blue Devils, Coach K cried. Between sobs, Coach K managed to mutter something along the lines of: “He's the greatest basketball player in the history of everything ever, and he crochets colorful mittens at halftime to…
This Howcast video offers a very fine recipe for a mint julep, although you should never serve it in a glass. You need a silver goblet, as any true Southerner knows. More importantly, a true Southerner also knows that a mint julep is not the product of…
Privatizing crime and punishment is a sure way to get the economy rolling. Two judges pleaded guilty to fraud after allegedly taking $2.6 million in kickbacks from privately run detention center in exchange for sending them thousands of innocent kids. And,…
Phoebe Cates, I just want you to know that if things between you and Kevin Klein don’t work out, I’m here for you. And I always will be. Serious. “Fast Times at Ridgemont High,” “Paradise,” and “Private School” were…
I couldn’t live my life without “The Early Show.” First of all, how else would I know what I’m supposed feel insecure about or afraid of? Every day I get a new worry. Sometimes two, like today: winter and walking. Winter is scary enough,…
A friend of mine said “Lost in Translation” was slow and boring so I slapped her. Hard. Nothing like violence to get across my point that Sofia Coppola’s film is nothing less than one of cinema’s most beautiful meditations on lives in flux. It’s a poem, and…
McDonald's Density Map Proves That America Is One Giant McDonald's
A Big Mac attack is hard to avoid, even for some vegans. And if you watch the Super Bowl, forget it. With commercials like the one above, you are doomed. America's love for thin, gray hamburger (?) patties that sit under heat lamps with orange salad dressing…
tybluesmith, posted September 24, 2009, 05:59 PM
speaking as a vegan i would like to say that only the special sauce induces cravings, sir.
Katrina Hero Brad Pitt Builds $80,000 Home -- for Gerbils
tybluesmith, posted September 10, 2009, 06:01 PM
i appreciate that you avoided the easy joke here.
1,017,949 People Follow Soleil Moon Frye on Twitter. Seriously.
Soleil Moon Frye has a million-plus people hanging on her every 140 characters, thanks to awesome tweets such as this: "A little sentence to finish. I am really good at..." Crowd participation is huge. Now, some of you may be asking, "Who the…
tybluesmith, posted September 02, 2009, 08:28 PM
heck yeah. where's ferris?
M.I.A. Starts Twitter War with Tenacious D
M.I.A. thought she would be on before the headlining Beastie Boys when she agreed to do the Outside Lands Festival, but things changed when Adam Yauch, a.k.a. MCA, was diagnosed with cancer. M.I.A. was none too happy to be opening up for the Beasties' replacement…
tybluesmith, posted August 31, 2009, 06:45 PM
m.i.a. wins
End of "Reading Rainbow" Found; No Pot of Gold
Today marks the end of the 26-year-run of "Reading Rainbow," hosted by LeVar Burton. The PBS show is a casualty of recession cutbacks, and a change in focus at the Department of Education. "'Reading Rainbow' taught kids why to read," said…
tybluesmith, posted August 28, 2009, 08:22 PM
awww. i used to love that show.
2009 U.S. Air Guitar Final Makes Blogger Miss Hair Metal Bands
It's not as easy to play the air guitar as you think. You can't discount the theatrics and big hair. (I miss you, Vixen!) Something about these performances makes me want to slide into a pair of stone-washed jeans and spray a couple of cans of Aqua Net in…
tybluesmith, posted August 28, 2009, 06:20 PM
whatever happened to lita ford????
Derek Jeter Engaged to Minka Kelly?
New York Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter is engaged to "Friday Night Lights" star Minka Kelly, if you believe Mr/s. Anonymous Source, quoted on Page Six in the New York Post. Jeter has dated every attractive woman in New York -- and maybe a few…
tybluesmith, posted August 27, 2009, 06:33 PM
is derek jeter a pro wrestler? oh that's right. he plays another fake sport.
All Edges Brownie Pan vs. Waffle Iron Brownies
Geeks think of some pretty cool stuff, and the All Edges Brownie Pan is certainly up there with light bulbs, airplanes, and air conditioning. The big pitch for the serpentine pan is: "This is the end of dry edges and uncooked centers." It even promises…
tybluesmith, posted August 26, 2009, 07:01 PM
ooh. vegan brownies coming right up who likes walnuts in theirs?
Don Cheadle Brings Basketball "Madness" to FX
tybluesmith, posted August 26, 2009, 06:15 PM
that'll be sweet. wonder what the ncaa will do?
Snoop Dogg in Amsterdam: Have Plant, Will Travel
tybluesmith, posted August 25, 2009, 02:41 PM
i don't smoke but dayummm. is he staying long enough to cure the plant etc etc?
"Daily Show" Alumnus Mo Rocca Still Working the Comedy-News Game
tybluesmith, posted August 24, 2009, 06:59 PM
mo was so funny on the daily show
Jennifer Aniston (Allegedly) Wants to Know What Renee Zellweger Has That She Doesn't
According to Us Weekly, Jennifer Aniston is upset that Bradley Cooper, her co-star in "He's Just Not That Into You," is just not that into her. Cooper dared to have dinner with Aniston at least once, but is now getting cozy with Renee Zellweger. Aniston…
tybluesmith, posted August 21, 2009, 05:26 PM
hens
Fake Poll: Half of "Mad Men" Fans Are Faking It
The only thing better than loving "Mad Men" is pretending to understand it. Not getting the show but passing yourself off as a fan is something every guy who works for Sterling Cooper would do, so consider yourself ahead of the game. According to…
tybluesmith, posted August 18, 2009, 04:30 PM
memo to amc: high def plz
"Mad Men" Season Opener: "Out of Town," Into New Problems
Way to start the season, "Mad Men." And I don't mean all the drama: I mean that close-up of Jon Hamm's gnarly finger toe. Or maybe it was a toe stunt double, since he was boiling milk, and you can never be too careful boiling milk around a star's…
tybluesmith, posted August 17, 2009, 07:45 PM
yeah but where is duck???
Brad Pitt, Mayor of New Orleans?
tybluesmith, posted August 14, 2009, 04:40 PM
ann curry is annoying
Wife of Monkees Drummer Micky Dolenz Pleads Guilty to NYC Apartment Scam
tybluesmith, posted August 10, 2009, 05:59 PM
i hate rich ppl
Ice-T Is a Cold-Blooded Computer Killer
Ice-T just did something I cannot believe is legal. PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Apples) doesn't care about this cruelty? If you can stomach it, Ice-T rips apart a Macbook in the video after the jump (peppered with language that is NSFW). I…
tybluesmith, posted August 10, 2009, 05:39 PM
did you see the souljah boy tell em animation where they parody ice t? oh man.
Sharon Stone Topless Again In Desperate Plea for Attention; Joe Eszterhas Writing Again In Desperate Plea for Attention
Can you still be a cougar past age 50? This is the question we have to ask when confronted by 51-year-old Sharon Stone, nude on the cover of Paris Match (SFW), with the headline: "J'ai 50 ans, et alors!" That means "Somebody acknowledge my…
tybluesmith, posted August 06, 2009, 07:20 PM
idk. still kinda works for me.
"Fraggle Rock" Movie, "Dark Crystal" Sequel in the Works
Are you ready to dance your cares away? Work is for another day -- except the work being done on the "Fraggle Rock" movie. Brian Henson, Jim's son, must have a team of Doozers hammering them out: they're working on the "Dark Crystal" sequel,…
tybluesmith, posted August 06, 2009, 07:05 PM
i can't wait to take my kids to the fraggle movie!
Weird Al Parody Tackles Most Controversial Subject Yet: Charles Nelson Reilly
It is hard not to think of Charles Nelson Reilly as the scarf-wearing funny man on "Match Game," but CNR was much, much more than that. He directed opera. He won a Tony award. He taught acting. He even Twitters from the grave: "Thinking about…
tybluesmith, posted August 05, 2009, 06:05 PM
i love that video
"Mad Men" Star Christina Hendricks: "Being Bad Is Sexy"
tybluesmith, posted August 04, 2009, 05:06 PM
i know her. she reads your posts about her btw.
"Sopranos" Movie In the Works?
tybluesmith, posted August 04, 2009, 04:55 PM
hecks yeah!
Ryan O'Neal Hit on Daughter Tatum at Farrah Fawcett’s Funeral
tybluesmith, posted August 03, 2009, 06:45 PM
o'neal is sharing that anecdote?????
Joe Jackson Confirms Omer Bhatti Is Michael's Love Child
Joe Jackson doesn't need a DNA test to make a determination of paternity. When he saw Omer Bhatti, he says, he could tell that Batti is Michael's son. "He looks like a Jackson, he acts like a Jackson, he can dance like a Jackson," he said in…
tybluesmith, posted July 30, 2009, 04:45 PM
but like that mean's that mike would have to sleep with.... forget it. my head is about to explode.
George Lopez: President Obama Knows Better Than to Upset Him
Comedian George Lopez thinks President Obama owes him a big favor for landing him the Hispanic vote. Who knew that "those 38 votes would be the difference," Lopez tells Zap2it.com. Obama appeared in a promo for Lopez's forthcoming new show, "Lopez…
tybluesmith, posted July 29, 2009, 04:38 PM
awesome post. LOL for reals.
A-Team Van for Sale on Craigslist
Is Mr. T out of gold chains to hock? Who would do such a dastardly thing as put "The A-Team" van (or a lookalike of the van that B.A. Baracus used to drive through explosions) for sale on Craigslist? Only $999. But Mr. T isn't the only suspect. The…
tybluesmith, posted July 27, 2009, 03:25 PM
hecks yeah!
Seth Rogen's "Green Hornet" Car Makes Him a Bona Fide Action Hero
First, Seth Rogen embarked on an aggressive workout routine. Now he's cruisin' in a '66 Chrysler Imperial for the upcoming "Green Hornet" movie. Can we handle Seth Rogen as a badass stud? Seth Rogen, the guy with the girlfriend voice in the clip…
tybluesmith, posted July 23, 2009, 08:45 PM
seth rogen. finally. a post i can read without wanting to kill myself.
David Letterman, Trent Reznor Agree with Nikki Sixx: Twitter Sucks
tybluesmith, posted July 22, 2009, 08:16 PM
well if trent says it.
Motlley Crue's Nikki Sixx Says That Twitter Sucks
tybluesmith, posted July 21, 2009, 08:17 PM
dude. thinks he has mystique? hardy har har.
Forehead vs. Windshield
Fresh today: a man fights a car. Who wins? Define "win." On the other hand, the fools in the video after the jump could learn something about head butts from this guy.
tybluesmith, posted July 16, 2009, 05:15 PM
your cuzzin from nc right?
David Eggers's Plan to Save Newspapers
David Eggers has had a couple good ideas: McSweeney's; "A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius," "Where the Wild Things Are." Maybe more. But this is not one of them: proposing that full-color comics can save newspapers and journalism. You're…
tybluesmith, posted July 16, 2009, 05:14 PM
compete with the web? umm. what about adapting?
Obama Throws Out the First Pitch at the 2009 All-Star Game
President Obama threw out the first pitch of the All-Star game, wearing a Chicago White Sox jacket, and the American League went on to win its thirteenth straight All-Star Game against the National League. But then, we could have predicted this outcome. Every…
tybluesmith, posted July 15, 2009, 02:45 PM
i heard charlie manuel had gas and smoked out the nl dugout
"Live Nude Comedy" Offers Burlesque, Laughs and Shannon Elizabeth
Showtime's "Live Nude Comedy" is a mix of stand-up and modern burlesque, so you can laugh and, um, enjoy other things, then laugh some more. Shannon Elizabeth, of "American Pie" fame (watch her play poker against George Costanza above), will…
tybluesmith, posted July 14, 2009, 06:46 PM
i love her until she starts talking.
Michael Jackson Murdered, LaToya Jackson Says
tybluesmith, posted July 13, 2009, 05:22 PM
i feel so sad now. darn.
Swearing Boosts Pain Relief
tybluesmith, posted July 13, 2009, 05:14 PM
where is his tOSU shirt?
The Guide to Breaking Up
There's no better way to celebrate Independence Day than by declaring yourself independent. And you don't even have to fake your death like Earl does above in the clip above. Break those chains, free yourself from your significant other's iron grip and…
tybluesmith, posted July 02, 2009, 07:14 PM
yeah but she makes way more than i do.
Megan Fox Doesn't Understand "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen," Either
tybluesmith, posted June 30, 2009, 06:17 PM
she's purty.
Christian Bale Tells Batman It's Over: "Seriously, Man, You and Me Are Effing Done Professionally"
Christian Bale played Batman? All I remember from "The Dark Knight" was the rad Batmobile and Heath Ledger's limp. Was there more than that? Whatever. Bale says his days manning the Batphone are probably over, especially if director Chris Nolan bails.…
tybluesmith, posted June 24, 2009, 06:20 PM
"it's effin distracting."
No Better Way to Honor Lincoln Than with Cheddar
tybluesmith, posted June 01, 2009, 03:06 PM
cheese makes me fart.
"The Office's" Jenna Fischer Is Really "NewsRadio's" Maura Tierney
tybluesmith, posted April 16, 2009, 01:48 PM
newsradio was my stuff boy.
Facebook Makes People More Stoopider. Science Says So.
Turns out college students are spending more time updating their Facebook status ("I just scratched my knee") than they are hitting the books. An Ohio State University study found that college Facebook user's GPAs were a point lower on average than…
tybluesmith, posted April 16, 2009, 01:47 PM
O-H-I-O
Somali Pirates Not Pirates, They're Just Dudes with Peg Legs, Parrots and Eye Patches
Just because a guy swings from a rope onto your ship through a cloud of cannon smoke, does not make him a pirate. Just because a dude says, "Shiver me timbers!" a lot does not make him a pirate. Knowing the combination to Davey Jones' locker, also…
tybluesmith, posted April 16, 2009, 01:47 PM
mmmm grog.
Usain Bolt Smoked Weed Once (Who Cares), Now Mixes Guinness and Red Bull (Throw Him in Jail)
tybluesmith, posted April 13, 2009, 06:13 PM
weed is bad.
Couples Who Spank Together, Stay Together
tybluesmith, posted March 31, 2009, 05:34 PM
wait. housework and spanking are the same? i get spanked a lot then.
Duke Great Shane Battier Picks UNC to Crush Blue Devils, Win National Title
When Shane Battier left the Duke Blue Devils, Coach K cried. Between sobs, Coach K managed to mutter something along the lines of: “He's the greatest basketball player in the history of everything ever, and he crochets colorful mittens at halftime to…
tybluesmith, posted March 20, 2009, 03:00 PM
Even with Lawson out right now?
Edgar Allen Poe Understood the Delicious Power of a Proper Julep
This Howcast video offers a very fine recipe for a mint julep, although you should never serve it in a glass. You need a silver goblet, as any true Southerner knows. More importantly, a true Southerner also knows that a mint julep is not the product of…
tybluesmith, posted March 05, 2009, 06:33 PM
i thought i was the only person who read that letter every spring.
Judges Lock Up Innocent Kids To Aid Struggling Economy
Privatizing crime and punishment is a sure way to get the economy rolling. Two judges pleaded guilty to fraud after allegedly taking $2.6 million in kickbacks from privately run detention center in exchange for sending them thousands of innocent kids. And,…
tybluesmith, posted February 13, 2009, 04:25 PM
one time we got fois gras at the central market and it had a truffle in the middle.
Phoebe Cates Was a VHS Puberty Goddess
Phoebe Cates, I just want you to know that if things between you and Kevin Klein don’t work out, I’m here for you. And I always will be. Serious. “Fast Times at Ridgemont High,” “Paradise,” and “Private School” were…
tybluesmith, posted January 08, 2009, 09:59 PM
awesome post.
Winter Is Scary!
I couldn’t live my life without “The Early Show.” First of all, how else would I know what I’m supposed feel insecure about or afraid of? Every day I get a new worry. Sometimes two, like today: winter and walking. Winter is scary enough,…
tybluesmith, posted December 30, 2008, 06:18 PM
The Dakota
Break.com Haiku
What a monstrous tongue. I bet you like ice cream cones, stamps, and lollipops.
tybluesmith, posted December 02, 2008, 09:21 PM
awesome. this is a great moment for the still unnamed new haiku movement.
For a Relaxing Time, Make It Suntory Time
A friend of mine said “Lost in Translation” was slow and boring so I slapped her. Hard. Nothing like violence to get across my point that Sofia Coppola’s film is nothing less than one of cinema’s most beautiful meditations on lives in flux. It’s a poem, and…
tybluesmith, posted November 25, 2008, 06:09 PM
umm. well. i like caddyshack.that's a good one.
VideoPOV: Guy Stuck in Class (3:34)
To shoot this, we hooked up our cameras to your brain.
tybluesmith, posted November 03, 2008, 07:17 PM
dead-on.