it seems that the celebrity swine flu epidemic has been contained, but we've all been so busy sneezing into our elbows that we've forgotten to watch the normal stuff, like spinach, or peanut butter, or cookie dough. Unfortunately, Elton John has fallen victim to one of those old-fashioned diseases, E. coli (so 2006), but it looks to be an isolated incident rather than part of any particular trend. Regardless of where his illness originated, he's become so sick that he's been forced to cancel a number of concerts with Billy Joel while he recuperates in a London hospital. Let's hope he'll be back on his feet soon, and scrubbing his vegetables more carefully in the future.

David Letterman's Top Ten List on last night's "Late Show" was a compilation of silly tips for avoiding swine flu. Most of them were, as Dave warned us, rather dumb and not worth repeating, except for #8: Be extra-vigilant when shopping at Piggly Wiggly (yes, that was the best one). Less dumb, however, are these cuddly pink H2N1 plush toys, which are being manufactured by a toy company in Connecticut and sold at the gift shop of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention in Atlanta. Also available in plush toy form: the mono, E. coli, and...wait for it...four different venereal diseases!

"Today" answered all of our burning (aching, feverish, sniffling) questions about swine flu this morning, debunking myths and providing tips for staying in the pink. But before getting into that, Lester Holt's first question needs to be addressed: "A lot of us don't even know when we have the regular flu. How do we know if we have the swine flu?" Uh, Lester, I beg to differ. When I had the flu last week, I DEFINITELY knew about it. So did my parents, all my co-workers, my roommate, my boyfriend, the drugstore lady, the bodega man, and anyone who had the pleasure of laying eyes on my pale, sweaty, hallowed face. The flu is not exactly something that can fly under the radar, like say, toenail fungus.

Anyway, back to the swine flu Q & A: it turns out that it actually comes from pigs! But don't worry about your bacon: this is a respiratory virus, so it is passed through liquid particles (uh, snot and saliva) that have been coughed or sneezed into the air. Moral of the story? Wash your hands, kids. More swine flu info after the jump.