11:56:36 AM Tara Ariano: We've seen "A Christmas Carol." We've seen "The Wolfman." And with last night's "Alice in Wonderland," I think that's going to be it for Victorian England for a while.
11:57:28 AM Will Edmondson: Yeah, imagine how cranky you would've been if we'd seen "Sherlock Holmes"!
11:57:48 AM Tara Ariano: I had the pleasure of seeing that with my parents. I think my dad only snored a little.
11:59:12 AM Will Edmondson: At least this wasn't really Victorian England. Victorian England on an acid trip, maybe. Tim Burton really ran with the ball on this one.

This week's "Modern Family" began with Haley freaking out after seeing her boyfriend at an Anne Hathaway movie with another girl. Claire, meanwhile, is nervous about meeting up with an intimidating old friend played by Minnie Driver, who is basically a big deal career woman now, with a million boyfriends in different countries and a convincing American accent. And Phil, after seeing a bus ad for his real estate services defaced with a drawn-on mustache, experiments with the look by sticking on a fake handlebar that he finds in the house with other Halloween accessories. More of this week's recap after the jump!

Mario Batali appeared on yesterday's "Late Night with Jimmy Fallon" for the third time, and I've got to say, he and Jimmy didn't have much to talk about. After all, there's only so much one can laugh at Jimmy's culinary clumsiness and hatred of mayonnaise. So what's a man to do when conversation runs dry? Improvise! Jimmy started babbling about wearing Mario's pants ("We're kind of like the brotherhood of the traveling pants. We shared pants, remember that?"), but Mario shut him down ("Let's not talk about it"), so it's quite possible they made it up. Amber Tamblyn did her best to entertain by inexplicably smelling her hands after Mario kissed them. Jimmy then got flustered and dumped pasta on the counter, so they all started swilling wine. It was, all in all, a noble attempt on all fronts -- but Mario should probably take a break before returning for Appearance #4, or at least be more forthcoming with pants stories. Compare the clip from last night, above, with his previous appearances (after the jump).

The second season of "The Rachel Zoe Project" premieres on Bravo tonight; we chatted with Rachel herself about what's in store for us fashion-hungry fans. In addition to more clothes, more designer appearances, and lots of great fruit-related Zoe-isms, the season will bring more business-related drama (bear in mind that it's a business of beautiful people, zillion-dollar outfits, and fancy parties). What's the biggest change this season? "I wanted to wear much, much, much less makeup!" says Zoe, who "can't even watch" the eyeliner-filled footage from Season 1. "I was like, wow why didn't anyone tell me I looked like that?" For the full interview and clips from tonight's episode, hit "continue reading."

Who but Johnny Depp could possibly play the Mad Hatter in Tim Burton's "Alice and Wonderland"? Depp and Burton made magic with "Edward Scissorhands" almost 20 years ago, and it might just be impossible for the duo to make a bad movie together. Add a little Helena Bonham Carter to the mix (natch), mix in some Anne Hathaway, and toss first-season "In Treatment" standout Mia Wasikowska into the pot as Alice and...well, that's just got to be magic.

Take a peek of Depp and Carter in full "Alice in Wonderland" gear, after the jump.

Tara Ariano: This movie really taught me a lot about how crazy women are! For someone who actually has been a bride, it was a real education.
Will Edmondson: Yes, and for someone who's terrified of marriage, it reasserted some of my deepest fears.
Tara Ariano: I'm not surprised. It really was a terrifying look at the stereptype of single-minded twentysomething women, afraid of dying alone, that movies want us to think are all around us. (They're not.)
Will Edmondson: How can you be so sure? To me, this was like "28 Days Later."

Today Charlotte and I continued our Oscar picks discussion, but before we reveal our picks for Best Actress, I would like to announce that this is now a competition. That's right, we decided to make it interesting. The stakes? The winner will make a torturous playlist of five clips that the loser will be forced to sit through, no fast-forwarding or skipping allowed.

We also received some comments on our last post (they were great, keep 'em coming!), that we'd like to respond to:

Bunting, we apologize for not recognizing Richard Jenkins from "Six Feet Under," and we appreciate your noble defense of "The Visitor." We're still Deep-sixing his Oscar nomination, though.

Hennessy, you raise a valid point about "WALL-E's" stage direction, and Charlotte agrees with you. However, I think once "WALL-E's" characters opened their mouths, it wasn't that spectacular. (I think "Milk" will win best screenplay anyway.)

For our conversation, and our picks for best actress, hit "continue reading."

Okay, Anne Hathaway, I get it. You're a catch. You're going to basically be handed an Oscar for "Rachel Getting Married," and you (probably) have already won a Golden Globe for the role. You're on the rebound from your long-term relationship with your Italian conman boyfriend. Your latest movie, "Bride Wars," is a bomb, but you got a paycheck and a new friend to pal around with (sorry to pile on).

Yeah, I like you. But stop this "dirty talk" business. My adolescent mind can't handle it. We saw the stunt you pulled on Jimmy Kimmel a month ago when you were on "The Daily Show." You don't have a crush on Jon Stewart! Don't say you do and let average looking guys like me get our hopes up.  My heart can't take anymore of this teasing.

Like my esteemed colleague Tara, my completely juvenile sense of humor makes me love bad movies. But, considering I basically am an adolescent boy, you can count me amongst the 10 people who sat through (and kind of enjoyed) "Gigli." ("I'm the bull! You're the cow!") Thus, when Defamer reported yesterday that the new Anne Hathaway-Kate Hudson chick flick "Bride Wars" had so far earned a ZERO on Rotten Tomatoes, I started giggling with anticipation at my desk.

Then, while on the train this morning, I read the Wall Street Journal's scathing review. Says reviewer Joe Morgenstern, "[Hathaway and Hudson] fall into fierce rivalry after a clerical error schedules their dream weddings at the Plaza Hotel on the same day in June. If this seems like a minor glitch in the grand scheme of things, rest assured that the grand scheme of things doesn't enter the picture. Nor does the fact that the Plaza has more than one ballroom." Oh dear. "Bride Wars," I'll see you in a couple months in the top slot of my Netflix queue.