Now that we've all had time to digest the news that former "Family Ties" star Meredith Baxter is a lesbian. In fact, Baxter's announcement got so much attention that it overshadowed other press appearances by some of her TV-mom peers. Check those out after the jump.

* In this case, what we are calling "news" should be understood as "made-up stories."

Former Mighty Morphin Power Ranger Jason David Frank wants to "prove that [he's] a real fighter." He's not joking, either. Frank has been training with UFC lightweight Melvin Guillard, and expects to make his professional debut soon, according to MMAWeekly.com.

"I know I have a target on my back," Frank said. "Everyone is going to want to beat up the Green Ranger."

Frank played the Green Ranger in the TV series and the White Ranger in the "Mighty Morphin Power Rangers" movie above.

"But I am no Kimbo," Frank added. "I’ve been training for a very long time."

Kimbo Slice was supposed to be the first mega-star of mixed martial arts, but was quickly proven to be an over-hyped street fighter. He was knocked out in a matter of seconds by a late-replacement, Seth Petruzelli, which you can watch after the jump. Also, check out the side-by-side photo of Frank in his Ranger gear and MMA gear.

How committed was the late Sen. Edward Kennedy to the cause of making health care affordable and accessible to all Americans? He even went so far as to play himself in an episode of "Chicago Hope," in which the hospital's docs travel to Washington to address a Senate subcommittee convened to examine the crisis. That was in 1997, mind you. Check out the full episode, above. (And thanks to Josef Adalian, of The Wrap, for the tip.)

As we see in the clip above, Fry has unfrozen Pauly Shore and released him back into the wild. And what does Shore plan to do with his newfound freedom? He'll star in "Adopted," a reality show about the process of adopting an African child. Wouldn't it be terribly fascinating if "Adoption" showed Shore trading in his questionable comedy for the role of being a champion for adoption? People seem pretty comfortable with the current advocates of international adoption (like usual suspects Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt), but with "Adoption," will that club have to admit "The Weasel"?

I didn't think today could be any more awesome after learning that British scientists had found a way to create sperm in a lab , but...yes, the day just got catapulted into a whole new stratosphere of awesome: Jon "Napoleon Dynamite" Heder has landed his own sitcom on Comedy Central. Heder is set to play an unemployed computer IT specialist who returns to his small town and moves in with his parents and younger brother.

In the event that your brain doesn't recognize the potential for hilarity when a computer geek -- PLAYED BY JON HEDER -- returns to the nest -- LOCATED IN A SMALL TOWN -- seeking comfort in the company of his parents, watch the clips after the jump to remind your sense of humor of what it is supposed to find funny.

Who but Johnny Depp could possibly play the Mad Hatter in Tim Burton's "Alice and Wonderland"? Depp and Burton made magic with "Edward Scissorhands" almost 20 years ago, and it might just be impossible for the duo to make a bad movie together. Add a little Helena Bonham Carter to the mix (natch), mix in some Anne Hathaway, and toss first-season "In Treatment" standout Mia Wasikowska into the pot as Alice and...well, that's just got to be magic.

Take a peek of Depp and Carter in full "Alice in Wonderland" gear, after the jump.

Time for a reality check: You think you know how to shave but you know as much about it as 10-year-old Macaulay Culkin.

Don't worry, though. We are here to save you, your face, and many other hairy regions of your grizzly-bear body, as well as give you some other creative things to try while staring at yourself in the mirror with a shaving-cream Santa beard.

Click "continue reading" for your the definitive guide to scraping your delicate skin with a razor-sharp, uh, razor.

According to a report in the "Daily Telegraph," it's now cheaper in the U.K. to buy a line of cocaine than it is a glass of wine or lager (or, as we call it, much less exotically, "beer"). But can you just go down the pub and buy a line off any old bleeder who happens to be there? ...Well, actually, you probably can; you just do it in the bathroom instead of at the bar.

But never mind: let's pour out a forty (gram) for the lost, exotic days when cocaine use was only within the grasp of rich idiots -- like the ones in "Less Than Zero," above. Good times.

Perhaps you've heard about how every newspaper everywhere is about to go under and the world is just going to give up on the notion of being informed about world events? Apparently it's the internet's fault, so, you know...sorry? But if you're reading this, you're part of the problem too. Truce?

Anyway, last week, Walter Isaacson wrote in "Time" that the solution to newspapers' ongoing financial flailing is micropayments. His theory: if consumers are willing to pay 99 cents for a song on iTunes, then consumers would probably be willing to pay a few cents for a news story too. What's sort of sad about this premise is that while iTunes is a successful business model, many billions more people still pirate music (and other media) illegally even though a system has been set up whereby they could do the same thing without risk. Poor Isaacson can't be expected to know that, though: he's an old man, and his grandchildren aren't about to fess up to him that they totally stole that new T.I. album.

But Isaacson's peer, Michael Kinsley, doesn't have to spare him the truth, and explains in today's "Times" that Slate tried micropayments a few years ago and no one went for it. (Hey, let's all read the article online, for free! IRONY!) Kinsley is fairly sanguine in his article as he explains that most of the currently extant newspapers are probably going to fail, but that the news industry will be the better for it. And frankly, if most newspaper editors are as easily duped as Lou Grant is, above, then the papers they run DESERVE to go under.

Thank God the "Times" hasn't gone under yet so that they could let us know that the mustache is back, baby! Except, as Gawker points out, this is a story they occasionally exhume, dust off, and publish in lieu of doing any actual journalism. Anyway, as the clip above amply demonstrates, the mustache is a look not everyone wants to pull off.