10:56:15 AM Will Edmondson: Last night we finally went to go see "Avatar" in 3D IMAX, and before we get started, let's set the scene: We got to the theater 15 minutes early and found that the line was out the theater, halfway down the stairs, and full of excited people. And once we got in the theater, it was packed. SEVEN weeks after it first released. So obviously, James Cameron is doing something right, and this whole "Avatar" phenomenon might be bigger than I'd thought.
11:00:02 AM Tara Ariano: Sure. By the time we saw it, it had surpassed "Titanic" to be the highest-grossing movie ever* (*not adjusted for inflation).
11:00:56 AM Will Edmondson: So in that vein, there's no reason to talk about the plot of this movie, because I don't think we're wrong in assuming that by this point, anyone who wants to see "Avatar" probably has. We should probably just talk about what we thought about it.
11:01:07 AM Tara Ariano: Yes, I'm sure that's true, and yes, we should.

11:02:11 AM Will Edmondson: So, cutting to the chase, "Avatar" is fine. It's an okay movie that does a few things really well and others very poorly. If I were a teacher, I'd give it a solid C+. It's not the worst movie that we've seen in the past year, but it's certainly not worthy of winning any major award on "merit" alone, either.
11:03:32 AM Tara Ariano: Yeah, I agree. Now that I've seen the "Transformers" sequel AND "Daybreakers," "Avatar" would have to really assault my senses and intelligence for me to say it was worse.
11:04:16 AM Will Edmondson: Wow! That's a lot tamer than the vitriol you were spewing last night, Tara. What caused your sudden moderation?
11:05:03 AM Tara Ariano: I would have been perfectly happy letting the "Avatar" phenomenon pass me by. I knew from the trailer that it wasn't my thing. I just think it's hugely overrated.

11:06:20 AM Will Edmondson: Well, going into it, what were your expectations? I think I'm on record as saying (or I should be, anyway) that "Avatar" would be a stupid movie that looked really cool. And I think that's about right. The way that movie looked on an IMAX screen was incredible.
11:07:42 AM Tara Ariano: To be honest, I found it hard to watch. I don't know if it's that we were sitting too close or what, but the lower part of the screen was really blurry (like when I have my real reading glasses on and they get smudgy) and the colors were weirdly washed-out. After probably the first hour or so I had to take off the 3D glasses because I was getting a headache.
11:09:23 AM Will Edmondson: Right, there are a lot of people who can't make it through three hours of that kind of 3D, apparently. However, I could, and I was kind of stunned by how much incredible detail they could get into that completely artificial landscape. Unfortunately, there was about an hour more of that movie than it needed. Cameron needs an editor really badly.
11:11:20 AM Tara Ariano: We both agreed on that last night. Obviously, James Cameron has a very vivid imagination and was really excited about all the plants and trees and creatures he invented, and didn't want to give any of them short shrift in the movie. The analogy I made last night was that "Avatar" was his "Funny People."

11:12:13 AM Will Edmondson: Right. If you were to edit this movie into a more concise story arc, it would become a much better movie.
11:12:38 AM Tara Ariano: We'll never know. I doubt the Director's Cut Blu-Ray that's already in the process of being readied for market is any shorter.
11:13:30 AM Will Edmondson: For someone who spent 12 years on this "other world," there were some things that just didn't make sense.
11:13:45 AM Tara Ariano: Yes. A few.

11:16:06 AM Will Edmondson: First, the biggest problem I had with the movie was that there wasn't an actual reason for us to side with the Na'vi. If you're going to make the argument that they're the Native Americans in this "Pre-Colonial New World" analogy, that's just not true. Native Americans are humans, the Na'vi aren't. And I think it expects a lot out of the audience to really pull for a group of aliens because they are basically tree-hugging PeTA activists.
11:16:51 AM Tara Ariano: I think the reason to side with the Na'vi is that they had the right not to have their home strip-mined.
11:18:09 AM Will Edmondson: To put it another way, if the point of this movie is that the Na'vi are virtual "people of the Earth," why set it on another planet and make them aliens? If you're supposed to hate the idea of bulldozing a forest on another planet for a mine, then you should also yell at a kid stomping on an anthill. I mean, respecting nature is one thing. But an alternate, fictional planet ultimately isn't nature.
11:18:40 AM Tara Ariano: Are you saying you're in favor of kids stomping on anthills?
11:19:21 AM Will Edmondson: No, but I'm also not naive enough to think that kids are going to stop doing it after watching "Avatar."
11:20:13 AM Tara Ariano: I'm not so naive to think that actual humans are going to stop irresponsibly exploiting natural resources on actual Earth after watching "Avatar" either, but that doesn't mean it's not a worthwhile subject for a movie.
11:22:00 AM Will Edmondson: If you're going to make that point, set it on Earth. There are enough actual problems in our actual world (see: Gore, Al) to make plenty of movies about. Don't set it on a fictional planet with fictional "people" and try to have a tangible moral argument come from it. And if you're going to do that, don't have your fictional world have so many obvious flaws.
11:22:36 AM Tara Ariano: That's what science fiction basically is, though: taking real issues or topics and giving them an allegorical treatment.
11:22:59 AM Will Edmondson: "Science fiction tends to be philosophy for stupid people." -- Chuck Klosterman
11:23:23 AM Tara Ariano: We've previously established that you don't like sci-fi, so let's move on.

11:25:19 AM Will Edmondson: The whole point of the humans being on Pandora is for them to mine "Unobtanium." What is Unobtanium, Tara? What do you make out of Unobtanium? Is it a precious metal like gold or platinum, which have tangible uses in manufacturing, as well? Or is it just a measure of monetary value, like paper currency? And if it is just a monetary instrument, like paper currency, then why not come up with another hypothetical Earth-native placeholder and save yourself all the trouble?
11:25:36 AM Tara Ariano: I'm pretty sure it was an energy source. So in other words, allegorical oil.
11:25:51 AM Will Edmondson: When do they make that point?
11:26:10 AM Tara Ariano: I probably read it somewhere ahead of time.
11:26:19 AM Will Edmondson: I'm talking about in the movie. Within the framework of the movie, it's never fully explained.
11:26:29 AM Tara Ariano: Hey, I'm not going to defend the story holes in this thing -- how could I? I'm just saying, if it's a commodity that's worth that much, and it's mined, and there isn't any on Earth, I'm making an educated guess.
11:28:57 AM Will Edmondson: But this builds off my "This isn't a good statement on Colonialism" complaint: When Europeans went to the new world, they were after raw materials. It's Mercantilism. If Cameron wants to make a connection to that structure have resonance, he has to complete the trading pattern. To not do that is asking the audience to trust your logic too much, and I couldn't get it out of my head.

11:29:11 AM Tara Ariano: Fair enough.
11:29:42 AM Will Edmondson: And then there's the whole "You had 12 years, and you didn't think to fix that?" argument. Because apparently, people are getting depressed about Pandora not being real. And James Cameron is giving acceptance speeches in Na'vi. And to me, this seems like Cameron's trying to make an alternate universe as robust as the ones from "Star Wars" and "Star Trek."
11:31:32 AM Tara Ariano: Well, I think that depression story was probably based on five kooks on a message board, but yes, I don't think there's enough story here to support a sequel, never mind a whole franchise.
11:33:24 AM Will Edmondson: I can imagine a Na'vi-only sequel, which I think could be pretty good, actually. It was only when the humans and Na'vis interacted that I got confused. Like when the evil Colonel can hold his breath for five minutes, or you can't breathe the air on Pandora but your skin is okay to be exposed to it, or when the airlock breaks and yet Jake Sully can still choke down some air and the pressure change doesn't throw him out the window.
11:35:20 AM Tara Ariano: Yes. The physics and biology of this world were poorly explained.

11:37:51 AM Will Edmondson: Not to mention the logic: When Michelle Rodriguez breaks rank and flies her helicopter into the thick of the battle, she paints racing stripes on it to look different. WHY WOULD YOU EVER DO THAT? It's an invitation to everyone to shoot you! That'd be like, to talk about "Star Wars" again, Luke and his posse painting a huge yellow star on the side of their Empire spaceship when flying back to the Death Star. It's just ridiculous.
11:38:20 AM Tara Ariano: Yes, she needed a lesson in sabotage.
11:39:32 AM Will Edmondson: So that brings us to the final point that I think you want to make, about the fact that this movie is now the favorite to win Best Picture.
11:40:21 AM Tara Ariano: Which it probably will win, making it only the latest mediocre movie to claim the title. (I mean, "Gladiator"? Whatever.)
11:42:34 AM Will Edmondson: I liked "Gladiator," but that's a different story. Now, of the 10 films nominated for Best Picture, I've only seen six: "Inglourious Basterds," "Up," "Up in the Air," "The Hurt Locker," "District 9" and now "Avatar." And of those six, I'd say "Avatar" was the worst.
11:44:32 AM Tara Ariano: I've only seen those and "The Blind Side," and I agree that "Avatar" was the worst hands-down. "The Blind Side" is second-worst, but that's a different conversation entirely.

11:46:13 AM Will Edmondson: Sure. So this comes down to what are the Oscars rewarding. Because "Hurt Locker" and "Basterds" are two of the best movies I've seen period, let alone this year. But "Avatar" is closing in on $2 billion worldwide, and has "changed the landscape of film."
11:46:46 AM Tara Ariano: No award show is actually about quality, so I'm sure "Avatar" will win for its box office.
11:47:20 AM Will Edmondson: Yeah, and that's too bad, I think. Anyway, any final thoughts? I have to say, this is a much calmer and reserved conversation than I was expecting after walking out of the theater with you.
11:48:51 AM Tara Ariano: I didn't have anything against the movie. I just didn't want to see it, and now that I've seen it, I know I was right.
11:50:06 AM Will Edmondson: I mean, your weeks of campaigning and general anti-"Avatar" ranting would some thinking differently, but I'm glad you've moderated your viewpoints.
11:50:54 AM Tara Ariano: I was just trying to defend myself. This movie's been hanging over me like the Sword of Damocles for a month. Frankly, I'm just glad it's over.