Between "Heathers" and "Mean Girls," there was this depressingly educational episode of "90210."

We open Chez Walsh, where we learn -- in case the episode title hadn't already tipped us off -- that Brenda is throwing a slumber party. She tries to play it off as "an evening of female bonding" so she doesn't look like such a baby, but none of the Walshes really buys it. Jim pops in long enough for Brenda to make him promise to stay out of the living room when her guests are there, and then REALLY makes good on his word by not appearing in the episode again. Way to get a full-episode rate for three lines, Eckhouse.

At the "Blaze" office, Brandon hands in his latest article and asks Andrea what she's going to be doing that night. She pompously replies that she'll be attending "a woman's conference"...at his house. Brandon's like, "The SLUMBER PARTY?" It's not a slumber party!

In the hallway, Brenda is having nearly the same conversation with Kelly, although I'm not sure if Donna's going to make it to the party if she has to go straight from school to a Salt n Pepa video shoot.

Anyway, Kelly's all, "Tell me this is not a slumber party." Brenda reiterates the party (heh) line: there will be bonding, and the sleeping will be incidental. But can't they invite some guys to come by after they're done talking and bonding? Brenda explains that they're going to have a night where they don't have to think about guys or talk about guys or worry about what they look like because there are guys around -- isn't that what they said they wanted? Yes, but there is a problem: Kelly made plans with another friend, Amanda Pacer. Brenda doesn't know her -- she's a senior -- but she and Kelly have been friends forever, which is why even though she goes to West Beverly, we've never seen her or heard of her before. Brenda cheerfully tells Kelly to bring her. No offense, says Kelly, but she doesn't want Amanda to think it's a slumber party. Brenda is annoyed. David overhears the party planning and announces to Scott that they'll be crashing. Scott thinks about making other friends who are less liable to get him arrested.

Elsewhere in the hall, Steve confirms that Brenda is kicking Brandon out of his own house: "I wouldn't stand for that if I were you." Brandon doesn't want to be where he's not wanted (unlike Steve, who, if he followed such a policy, would find his social options severely constrained). Steve suggests that they go find some girls who are interested in having slumber parties with guys, though I'm not sure the local nervous hospitals have visiting hours at night. The guys run into girls, so Steve decides to be a jerk for no reason and ask whether they all have their nighties ready for tonight. Too bad Steve has to miss it, Brenda shoots back tartly: "From what I hear, cheap thrills are about all you're getting these days." "Left YOU in the dust," gloats Donna, as proudly as if she had actually said it. Steve: "Your sister dissed me!" Steve should really be more used to that sort of thing by now.

Later, Chez Walsh, Brandon gets the door for Kelly and Donna, each with a sleeping bag. Brenda bounds in asking where Amanda is. Kelly hedges that she'll be coming later. She wanted to have her own car, in case... Donna fills in the obvious, which is that Amanda wants to be able to bail if need be. Kelly quasi-politely predicts that the non-slumber party might be a bit too "down home" for her. Brenda sends them upstairs to change. Kelly warns Brenda that she doesn't have a nightgown: "I sleep in men's silk pajamas." Brenda: "Whose?" Also, that's something that needs to be announced in advance? She ends up being more covered-up than everyone at the party, including Cindy.

Elsewhere, Steve and Brandon manage to get the dope parking spot out front of Floodlights, an allegedly hot club. Brandon worries that they're not going to get in, but Steve says they never card if you're dressed right. There's a pause. Steve: "Failing that, I'll slip the guy twenty bucks." Brandon: "What's wrong with the way I'm dressed? I bought this tie in Canada!" I wish we could get in close enough to see the whimsical moose that are almost certainly woven into the pattern. As the guys head to the door, their paths cross those of a couple of trampily dressed chippies, who give them an impossibly flirtatious look. Brandon asks whether Steve really thinks he can pick up a girl at the club, and Steve confidently says he does. If questioned, he'll say he works for his father's import-export business and goes to SC part-time. What's Brandon's cover? He says he'll claim he plays for the L.A. Kings. Uh, this isn't a test in hw to pick up a girl on the internet, dude. Steve tells him to say he took a year off from UCLA to find himself: "They'll eat that up." Brandon muses that Brenda would love this place. Steve says that her party's probably crashing and burning by now: "Girls need guys; they can't have fun without us."

Cut to the core four girls, dancing like maniacs, proving Steve wrong for the nine millionth time in his life.

Cindy enters, bearing snacks, and they pull her into the circle, whereupon Cindy decides to try having an independent moment that doesn't involve adultery and dances up a storm with the rest of the girls. It's sort of cute and sort of really dorky.

Amanda lets herself in and stands in the doorway, judging everyone, as she is and will be wont to do throughout the episode.

After yelling "Hello" a couple of times, she finally manages to get people finally notice her, and Kelly introduces everyone. Cindy takes off, and Brenda, noticing that Amanda hasn't brought a sleeping bag or any kind of overnight accoutrements, hospitably offers her a nightshirt. Amanda gives her the full stinkface (it's way past just stinkeye) and takes Kelly aside to tell her that there's a huge frat party they have to go to. Kelly reminds her that they planned to do this. Amanda says that she can't just sit around a slumber party like a schoolgirl, and Kelly reminds her that she IS a schoolgirl. Amanda shrugs that, fine, then she's a schoolgirl who gets invited to the best parties. Kelly tells her to have fun, so Amanda says that she'll stay for a couple of hours; by then, Kelly will have come to her senses. Kelly says that she'll have fun. Amanda refuses to "parade around in some strange girl's nightshirt," but does not ask whether Jim has any silk men's pajamas she could borrow.

And then we're in the kitchen, where more snacks are being prepared. Brenda runs down all the ice cream flavors they have available. Kelly asks whether she has any cookies to smoosh into said ice cream. Amanda judges everyone -- this time, from a sitting position.

Brenda asks what Amanda wants, and Amanda coldly replies, "Nothing. Kelly: "Come on, Amanda, you'll make us all look like pigs." Amanda: "You said it, I didn't." Everyone freezes for a second...

...but then they shake it off and grab their bowls. Brenda snorts like a pig at Amanda. There are giggles.

Living room. Donna defends her choice to eat ice cream with popcorn on it. I wouldn't necessarily do THAT, but I do like a swalty snack -- popcorn with M&Ms in it is an enduring pleasure. Amanda has now moved her judging to an armchair.

Seriously, kick her out. Kelly: "Here's something we would never do [if there were guys present]: pig out." Brenda: "Do you eat on dates, Amanda?" What a...weird question. Or, I guess not, based on Amanda's response: "Never. But I always order something expensive." Andrea asks why, and Amanda smugly says, "To let them know I'm worth it." Kelly says that she knew it was over between her and Steve when she started pigging out on all their dates. Brenda cracks, "He never took you out to eat, Kelly!" Hey, they had already broken up when Brenda got to town! She wouldn't know that! Quit trying to act cool in front of Amanda!

When we return to Floodlights, Steve is trying to bribe his way in. When it doesn't work, he starts muttering that the scene is weak and so forth, to cover his social impotence. He and Brandon get back in the car, where Brandon nicely tells him not to worry about it. And then Brandon peers into the side mirror and asks whether Steve remembers those two chippies from before. Steve doesn't know which ones Brandon means at first, so Brandon describes them. One of them is in bike shorts with garters sticking out underneath (and used to play the nanny who became Mike's girlfriend on "Growing Pains," though obviously that's not part of Brandon's description). "The other one's wearing one of those tops that looks like a bra but isn't a bra but IS a bra?"

NOW Steve remembers. Brandon tells Steve they're coming over. Brunette says, "It's so dead in there tonight; I don't blame you guys for bailing." Blondie says, "God, I love your car. It's so hot." Steve smirks that it gets him where he needs to go. "I want one of these someday," Blondie coos. Steve asks what the girls are doing tonight. "I don't know. What ARE we doing?"

Oh boy.

Blondie: "I love the stick shift -- is it hard to drive?" Get it? Steve says that, with a sports car, stick shift is the only way to go, and yammers on autophilically in a way that might make you think he doesn't drive an AMERICAN CAR. "You ever driven a stick before?" Steve asks. GET IT?! Blondie: "No, but I always wanted to!" She asks if she may shift gears, and Steve tells her when. I really hope you get it now, because...not subtle. And then we're over at the seduction currently underway in the neighboring bucket seat, as Brunette enthuses, "God, Brandon, you have the most beautiful hair! It's so THICK! It's perfect hair for a convertible." Next she's going to be telling him how great it is that his economical height probably means he consumes fewer resources than the average American. Steve suggests that they go back to the girls' place, but Brunette immediately counters that they should go back to HIS place. Steve claims that his and Brandon's place is getting earthquake-proofed, so they need to stay out all night: "Got any ideas?" Blondie knows of a secluded parking lot behind a boarded-up elementary school. Romantic! They could hang out and talk. It's an absolutely ridiculous idea, but Steve and Brandon love it, because all the blood has rushed into their pants.

Chez Walsh, Brenda is "in sugar shock." On the other side of the room, Amanda has a dirty look. Surprise! Donna suggests that they rent "Pretty Woman," and Kelly laughingly reminds her that she's seen it 300 times. Donna: "It's dependable!" She goes on to say that, sometimes, she dreams about running away and becoming a hooker on Hollywood Boulevard just so that she can meet Richard Gere. Kelly points out the only problem: she's not Julia Roberts. She defuses the meanness (yet accuracy) of her statement by saying she's just being honest: she wouldn't want Donna to ruin her life. Brenda says that they're not renting a movie: the whole point of the party was so that they could talk! Brenda, Donna, and Andrea go take the dishes to the kitchen, whereupon Amanda jumps over to the couch and tells Kelly that if they ditch the party now, they'll get to the frat "fashionably late." How "fashionable" do you actually have to be at a FRAT PARTY? Kelly is obviously tempted...

...but says she promised Brenda that she'd stay. "Come on, I would never put you through this kind of torture!" Amanda whines. Kelly: "Can't you just relax and have fun?" Amanda: "NO! This is completely seventh-grade, and you know it!" She's kind of not wrong, but still.

Enter the Dork Patrol, with Andrea's Ouija Board. Amanda scoffs audibly. Andrea shirtily tells her that it's a powerful tool. Amanda: "I'm so scared!" They set up, throughout which Amanda can't stop snorting. Kelly smirks, but also nudges her to shut up. Andrea asks whether there's anyone they'd like to contact. Brenda nervously says doesn't know anyone who's dead, so Andrea suggests her grandma. The board spells out "I AM HERE." I think this says it best.

Andrea: "Grandma?" We see what looks like lightning. Everyone's like, "She's here!" Donna: "I'm really scared!" We see the weird flicker of light again. All the girls scream.

And then, we're on the front porch. Psych! It's not lightning: it's David, standing there with poor Scott, taking photos of the girls through the window. Scott tells David that the girls are going to kill them. David: "But what a way to go."

Back to the living room. Cindy has shown up to see what the fuss is about, and is told, "There's some creep outside taking photos of us!" The girls all go straight for the front window -- which is enormous and opens like a french door without the lock, which seems like a safety issue for a ground-floor window but WHATEVER -- and snatch the camera from David. They call him a pervert, geek, and loser before sharply snapping the curtains closed.

Outside, David comments, "That was my mom's camera." Heh.

Inside. Brenda: "I can't believe such immature people go to our high school." Amanda: "Neither can I." OH SNAP. Amanda teases Andrea for putting away the Ouija Board, but Andrea says that it's too powerful; they're not ready for it. Amanda checks her watch, and hisses, "Dammit." What? "It's after midnight." Brenda: "Do frat boys turn into pumpkins?" No, they turn into drunken slobs. I'm pretty sure they start out that way, too, but anyway, she snaps at Kelly, "You sure made my night." Kelly sourly points out that Amanda didn't have to come. Amanda sarcastically says that she couldn't bear missing all the party games? So why doesn't she just leave? Amanda says she doesn't want to: "Everyone's ruined my night; it's tume for me to ruin theirs." What does she mean? Suggesting "Skeletons in the Closet" is the first thing in the whole episode that dislodges the crabby look from Amanda's face.

The game is: one girl sits in the middle of the circle, and has to answer every question the others throw at her. What, they couldn't get the rights to "Truth or Dare"? Anyway, no one wants to play, but no one wants to SAY they don't want to play. Kelly warns, "This game can get pretty intense." Amanda: "The more intense the better." Brenda, of course, doesn't want to lose face in front of Amanda, so she says they should do it. Kelly volunteers to go first.

Steve steers his dumb car into the Secluded Parking Lot. They park. And then they start making out, each guy with his same-colored-hair counterpart.

This is what a rich kid does on a Friday night? Blondie: "I wanna drive it." Anytime, says Steve, obviously distracted. "I wanna drive it now. It'll really make me crazy." Steve: "Everybody out of the car: Trina wants to drive it." Blondie drives around for a while, all jerky like she doesn't know what she's doing, while Steve mutters that she's stripping his gears. But then she stops and bellows, "COME ON." Brunette runs over and hops in, and they peel out. Bye, car. Brandon thinks they aren't coming back, but Steve insists they are, and that they will sit there and wait for them! Because Steve is an idiot!

After commercials, Steve is still waiting, and still an idiot. Brandon asks what Steve thinks the girls are doing in his car. Steve proposes that maybe they went to get them beer, or maybe Blondie left her purse at the bar and there's a long line to get back in. Brandon is rightly dubious. Steve: "Brandon, you saw the way they were coming on to us! You can't fake that stuff!" You really can. I mean, YOU can't, Steve, but people can. Brandon yells back that the girls stole Steve's car and scammed them, and that he's done waiting. He stomps off. And Steve? Cries.

And Brandon feels sorry for Steve and comes back. Steve makes with the pity party: what'll his dad say? He'll be totally humiliated at school! Brandon has to swear he won't tell anyone. Brandon: "Scout's Honor." Steve: "Why Scout's Honor? No one's ever said that to me before." "Well, that's the problem, Steve. These kinds of things don't happen to good scouts." Brandon, of course, is such a good scout that he had no problem riding illegally with some chick in his lap, nor did he tell Steve not to let Blondie drive his car. SHUT UP, BRANDON.

Chez Walsh, Kelly is in the hot seat for Skeletons in the Closet. Amanda is disgusted at the kinds of tame questions getting thrown at Kelly, like her middle name or favorite color, but the girls defensively say they're just warming up -- which turns out to be true when Andrea asks about Kelly's first sexual experience. Amanda: "Now THAT'S more like it." Kelly says that it was with Steve. After they'd been dating a month, he brought up the topic of sex. Neither of them had done it before. Both were curious, him moreso than her (as stands to reason, given that perm of his). There came a point when it was all they talked about, so finally they did it in his bedroom one day after school, with Steve's mom downstairs getting interviewed by "Entertainment Tonight." The reporter even talked to him afterward, and he had a huge grin on his face the whole time. Amanda: "No. Why don't you tell them about the REAL first time you had sex?" Uh oh. Kelly, trying to maintain her composure, says that WAS the first time. "Oh, really? What ever happened to Ross Webber?" Poor Kelly.

Kelly says that Ross Webber was this "godly stud on the football team." She had a huge crush on him as a freshman. Amanda throws in the detail that this was "BNJ": "Before Nose Job." Andrea shakes her head, like, "Classy." Kelly goes on to say that she spent the whole year hanging around him, until finally there was a big football victory. Everyone was getting drunk (except Kelly), and drove up to Mulholland. Ross wanted to take her into his favorite part of the woods, and she stupidly thought that sounded fun. He kept saying, "Come on, Kelly, I know you want it." Her voice breaks: "And I did. But not on the ground. He didn't even bring a blanket." It was over pretty quickly, and then he took her home and never talked to her again. Sounds like someone should have called the Rap Line! "Is that what you had in mind?" Kelly cries. Everyone feels awkward, except Amanda, who is a monster.

Cop shop. Steve and Brandon recap their stupid story to a dubious cop, who finally says that if Blondie drove the car with Steve's consent, it's not car theft, it's car-borrowing, and he can't report it stolen until 48 hours have passed. Steve is an even bigger idiot than we thought.

Chez Walsh, it is Andrea's turn in the circle. Amanda: "Why does everybody call you ONdrea?" "Excuse me?" sniffs Andrea. Amanda: "What are you, British?" "It is pretty pretentious," says Kelly, who's just relieved not to be in the hot spot that she'll turn on the next most likely victim. "'ANNdrea' is a little boring and common," says Andrea. "I like to be different." Brenda: "Good answer." Uh, no it's not. Either "ONdrea" is your given name, or you're a douche. Anyway, Andrea asks if she's through. Not yet: "Have you ever slept with a guy before?" "Uh, that's really personal," says Andrea, flustered. Amanda: "That's the point of the game. If you can't take it, maybe you should go home." Andrea coughs it up: duh, she's a virgin. Kelly asks which guy at school she would sleep with. Andrea says she can't answer that: "I guess it would have to be--" "Brandon?" "No," says Andrea, too quickly. Brenda: "No?" Andrea covers with the fable of some German lifeguard who saved her at Zuma Beach last summer...

Yeah, no one buys it. But then Amanda twigs as to the identity of this Brandon they're talking about: "Wait a second. Is this the same guy you're always walking around the halls with, and batting your big cow eyes at?" Andrea doesn't get it. Amanda: "Get a life, Andrea, everyone knows. Not that they care." Kelly: "It's true." Poor Andrea is forced to admit that she does love Brandon, like everyone didn't already know.

Speaking of Brandon: he's at the police station, conferring with Steve on which one's mom they should call from the pay phone. Steve: "Definitely your mom. At least she won't hit me." She might. She DANCED earlier! Dubious Cop tells Brandon and Steve that they just picked up two girls, with no ID, going over 100 in Steve's stupid car.

Chez Walsh, Donna's in the circle. But! She has no secrets! She tells them everything! Brenda asks which guy in school she would go out with. Kelly: "Greg Houseman. You know that." Donna never shuts up about him, apparently, although we've never heard of him before and never will meet him on this show. Anyway, asked the most dishonest thing she's ever done, Donna says, "Nothing." Brenda: "Didn't anybody in your family ever go insane or something? Anything?" "No," says Donna apologetically. "We're all really normal." Amanda accuses Donna of being hopelessly boring, since anyone who can't come up with one secret is either lying "or a total zero." And this is where Brenda finally turns on Amanda!

"That is not true," snaps Brenda. Amanda: "Why? What are you hiding, Brenda?" "Nothing, Amanda," grits Brenda. Amanda: "Really? That's not what I hear." Oh, like Amanda's heard anything about Brenda. She's a junior!

Cop shop. And here are the girls! For some reason, the parties pressing charges are allowed to just chat in the hallway with the perps, but anyway, the girls breathlessly claim that they came back to the parking lot and the guys weren't there; they were driving so fast, wanting to get back to them and worrying that they'd never find them again! Steve melts (because he is an idiot). Brandon sees where this is going and starts braying at Steve, but Steve urgently hisses at him to shut up, and Blondie shoots Brunette a justified look of triumph at having put one over on him.

Steve flirts that Blondie has to make it up to him, and Blondie says that she will, and that's all it takes for Steve to say he wants to drop the charges. However, Dubious Cop says that he can't; Blondie already has a prior warrant for speeding, and has to pay $150 bail. "And I'm broke," pouts Blondie. She hasn't been playing with Steve's shirt buttons more than a second and a half before Steve announces that he will pay it! HOW DUMB CAN ONE HONKY BE?!

Back to Skeletons in the Closet: FINALLY, Brenda's up. Kelly asks the most outrageous thing she's ever done. Brenda tells a story about going to the lake the previous summer with some guys, who skinny-dipped. Did she? NO, because the guys just did it to try to get the girls to take their clothes off, so instead, when the guys were in the water, the girls stole their clothes. Amanda, sarcastically: "How outrageous!" Brenda: "WHY DON'T YOU JUST SHUT UP!" GOD, I love bitchy Brenda. It took way too many episodes for her to arrive.

Amanda: "Ooh! Did I hit a nerve?" "No," Brenda shoots back, "it's just that you've been acting like a total bitch since the minute you got here." Amanda fake-apologizes that she didn't mean to be rude: "So is that it? No shameless secrets from your past?" Brenda hesitantly says that there is one, and she volunteers it so quickly that I'm sure she's about to make up a story where she killed someone, just to shut Amanda up. But no: Brenda just made out with her best friend Marjorie's boyfriend in Minneapolis. Marjorie found out, and confronted Brenda. And Brenda knows she did it purposely, to break up Marjorie and her boyfriend; it ruined their friendship forever.

But now KELLY has a confession! After Brenda started going out with Dylan, Kelly tried to get a date with him. Brenda, of course, is furious. Kelly defensively says that she's always liked him, and that he flirted with Kelly all last year, before Brenda moved here. Did they ever go out? No. "I guess he wasn't interested," Brenda sniffs. Kelly bitterly says that she was just trying to be honest, and she thought after this Minneapolis story that Be would understand. Brenda? Come on. She never understands. Indeed, she leaps to her feet to deliver this blow: "What -- understand that you were putting the moves on my boyfriend?!"

Kelly: "You know, ever since you started going out with Dylan, you have developed this side to your personality that is completely unbearable." HA! It's true. The difference is, I can watch it from here, and I love it. Brenda asks Donna whether that's true. Donna: "Well, you have become a little stuck-up." "ME? You and Kelly are the two most stuck-up people I have ever met in my life!" Brenda, don't ask the question if you don't want the answer. Kelly gets to her feet, too, obviously ready to leave. And Andrea can't believe them! She came tonight to make good friends (or, any friends): "You guys are so gossipy! Thanks for the memories. I'm out of here." So's everyone else. "Told you we should have gone to the frat party," snips Amanda. And then Brenda has a realization: "HEY. We haven't put Amanda in the circle." Kelly agrees. Amanda says that they're all a bunch of dupes, and that she would never play this game. The rest wish they hadn't. But Brenda says she's glad Kelly told them her horrible story, and, I hope, not because she plans to hold it over Kelly's head for the rest of their friendship. Kelly, for her part, says that it's nice to know Brenda's not so perfect after all. Kelly apologizes: "I would never try and steal Dylan from you." (Or...you know, not again.) Brenda won't lose another friend over a guy! And they hug. Kelly says she's sorry she called Andrea pretentious. Andrea's sorry about "gossipy" (however accurate it may be). Donna's sorry for not having more problems: "But I plan to. And when I do, I'm going to need your shoulders to cry on." Shut up, Donna. You ARE a zero. And then: group hug.

Absent from the group hug, obviously, is Amanda, who slips out behind them while no one's looking. "Good riddance" seems to be the consensus. Andrea notices that she left her purse, and Donna goes to grab it, saying they should throw it out the window. But when she picks it up...

Kelly recognizes the spillage as diet pills: "Take too many of these and PMS starts to look like a vacation." Of course, this is when Amanda comes back, and sees that her secret is out. Kelly: "Amanda, when's the last time you ate?" Amanda does not care for this line of inquiry at ALL. Kelly says that Jackie used to take these diet pills (of course): "They kill your appetite and murder your personality." "Look, I'm just not lucky enough to be born as beautiful as you," whines Amanda. "I've got to work at it, all right?" Kelly gravely says that Amanda IS beautiful. But, of course, Amanda used to be fat in eighth grade. She lost the weight and swore she'd never be fat again, "no matter what." "Even if it's turned you into a total bitch?" snaps Kelly. "What do you want me to do, blimp out?" shrieks Amanda. "God, guys don't go for fat chicks, everybody knows that!" Kelly says that she doesn't have to be fat, but why doesn't she relax and be whoever she's going to be, "without all these pills?" Amanda wishes she could! Would it help to talk about it? Amanda: "Guess you guys got me. My skeleton's out. I used to be fat, and now I'm thin. And I'm a bitch." Um, that's not a secret. Amanda snatches her stuff and turns to go, but for some reason, Brenda begs her to stay. Amanda can't believe Brenda doesn't want her to go. But no: "I want you to stay here with the rest of us." So they can torture her like she tortured them? So that they can enjoy more of her winning personality? Amanda: "Are you...are you sure?" Everyone is. This is a very disappointing denouement. I think Darren Star just ran out of pages. Okay, Amanda will stay. All this talk of diet pills has apparentl reminded Donna: are there any more chocolate-covered cookies? Yes, says Brenda, they're in the fridge. Amanda: "Hey, Donna. Will you bring me a couple?" Sure. "On second thought, will you bring the whole box?" Eating disorder solved!

Back at the cop shop, Blondie gives Steve what he thinks is her phone number but obviously is not, as he reads after she's flitted off: "'This certificate good for one deluxe manicure at Trina's Nails'?" He can't figure it out: what happened? Brandon: "Steve, we got scammed. But you know what? I had a blast, man." Steve agrees: "Sure beats the hell out of a slumber party!"

Finally, back Chez Walsh. The girls asleep in the living room. Brenda wakes up -- on the couch, so you can tell she's a TERRIBLE slumber party hostess. "Most guys'd die to be in this room," Brandon muses. Asked how he spent his night, he will only say he's been out doing "guy stuff." And Brenda? "Oh, you know. Girl stuff." "Meaning what?" "Meaning you tell me, I'll tell you." "Forget it. I don't even want to know what girl stuff is." "Good, I wouldn't have told you anyway." And then, goodnights. "Goodnight, John-Boy," says Kelly from the floor. That's the most timely act-out line they could come up with? In the age of "Pretty Woman"?! Weak.